Robert Sugden, Single Dad
by Rocks-my-socks
Summary: Robert Sugden knows three things, and three things for a fact: Lachlan White is hiding something. Aaron Dingle is the love of his life. And until Bex White wakes up, he is a single dad.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** Emmerdale, Robert, Aaron, Liv and Seb do not belong to me. As normal, I am just a fangirl with a plot.

 **Robert Sugden, Single Dad.**

 **Chapter 1**

Up and down. Up and down.

Robert Sugden was not so sure when the rise and fall of Bex White's chest had become so important to him.

Except he did. It was when she had become the mother of his son. He sat with Seb in arms in the ITU of Hotton General Hospital, praying at the end of all of this, to a god he did not know if he believed in, that they were not going to lose her.

Seb needed his mother so much. Robert knew what it was like to be without a mother, and he did not want that life for his son. He would not wish that on anyone, least of all his lad.

If Seb was going to have any sort of decent life, Robert was sure he was going to need at least one decent parent. And though he had been a dad for a while now, he was convinced that no matter what else, he was yet to count as a decent parent.

If he was a good dad then there was no way he would have taken his little boy out of the car which his mother had put him into. If he was a decent dad then he was not going to have taken off with him and put them all in the position where his mothers family felt they had to give chase. And yet there was a voice within him which said actually, yes he would have. Deep down he knew he had been doing the right thing for it was not as if he had done it to upset Rebecca. He had done it so she was not going to take his little boy to Australia.

He held Seb a little together at their mere thought of it. He was not going to lose him. He was not going to let anyone take his lad. He had been a decent dad when he had tried to protect his son from a life without one of his parents.

Yet that was the very situation which his son was in right then.

If Bex had only gone to mediation…

But there did not seem to be a lot of point in thinking like that now and, whatever she had done wrong, whatever sins she had committed, the lord only knew Rebecca had paid for it all so dearly and in some many ways.

The first way she had paid for it was with her own health. That was why the three of them were sitting in that room.

She had paid for it by missing time with Seb, the thing she had been trying to protect.

And in the end, she had had to pay for it with her family. When she woke up, for he was convinced that she was going to for she _had_ to, she was going to awake to a world where her nearest and dearest were gone.

One of the first bits of news she was going to get was her dad and sister were dead.

He did not and could not imagine how she was going to feel. True, he had lost his mother and his father but it was not as if he had done it all at once and he had always had Victoria to get him through it.

He knew Rebecca was going to be devastated and so he was going to do everything within his power to make sure that when she did wake up, she at least had her son with her, so she knew there was still hope for her future.

She wasn't going to be on her own.

They stayed there with Bex for four hours during in which time Seb had one bottle, two nappy changes, and Robert tried three different lullabies to get him to sleep.

It was a case of comas by numbers for them.

This had become Roberts routine in the afternoon and he followed it almost religiously in high hopes that one of these familiar sounds would bring the mother of his son back.

He knew people were going to question why he was doing this. He had seen them when he had been loading up Seb in the car – he had read the thoughts in their mind. He was Robert Sugden so as far as well over half the village was concerned he had to have a motive for whatever he did – perhaps to get his hands on Rebecca's inheritance - and maybe he had a reason for being there as well – but if he did, then it was to keep her safe and he had a feeling that was going to surprise people.

He could be wrong and if he was, then he could only hope that in time he was going to be forgiven for what he was thinking in time, but he had known Lachlan White for too long to trust him. He would not trust him as far as he could throw him and he never would.

And in his heart, he knew this came down to Lachlan.

He had done something which had meant he had lost his mother and his grandfather and he was the reason his aunt had nearly died.

One too many times he had seen the young man hanging about his aunt's room in a way which Robert minds did not like. The hardest thing was it was not as if he could even talk to anyone about what he was thinking because they all felt so sorry for Lachlan and he knew it sounded crazy. But that little freak had scared him Robert in the past when he had been conscious. He did not like to think what he could do a vulnerable woman in a coma who had no way of defending herself.

So Robert sat by Bex on guard for as much as the day as he could until they could hear the truth. He safeguarded the mother for a son he had once not wanted.

There was no way Robert was going to sleep easy until she could.

Seeing the time, however, he got up from where he had been seated. If he could stay on guard for longer then he would but he had a little boy who needed his rest.

Seb coughed a little as his father put him into his pram, causing Robert to make nonsense noise and stroked his sons check to soothe him.

"It's ok, little man," he didn't have his mum right then but his dad was not going anywhere.

"He is fine with me Rebecca – you just focus on getting yourself better for our boy," Robert murmured in leaving and then made for the door, left the hospital and drove home.

When he got there, however, he found Lucky White was still on his mind.

If the truth was known, he was going to feel a lot better for Seb and for Bex when Lachlan was out of their lives. He was sure the day was going to come eventually. Robert was not going to have him around his boy, that was for sure. Seb was no more capable of defending himself than his mother and who really knew what Lachlan was capable of. Though they were cousins, he hoped to ensure his son and Lachlan were never going to be family.

Which was in complete contrast to his sister, who was probably the best friend, he had right then. Well maybe not, he thought as his heart tightened.

For just a moment he had been distracted by the person who was truly his best friend coming into his mind and he had not let himself be that in a number of days. He could not think of his best mate right then because he missed him too much. It did not matter that the two of them lived in the same place, for to him it felt as if they might as well be on different continents. That was his fault and he held his hands up to that. If he had been a different person who had shown a little more faith then he and his best mate would still have the kind of - _friendship_ \- which he wanted from him.

The kind of friendship which he neigh on needed from him just then, the one in which he got to call him husband. He breathed through the weakness which he allowed himself right then but there was no point in dwelling it.

He still had to get his lad bath, changed and give him a bottle before he tried to get him down for the night.

He was not going to be able to do that if he thought of Aaron for too long.

He turned his mind back to the matter in hand.

"How was she?" his sister asked as soon as he got into the cottage.

"No change," Robert admitted. He had hoped something was going to change by now but they had had no such luck.

"Dinner is on – come on, take your coat off."

Home was the place where they had to take you in - that was what Robert had heard.

And it was certainly true in their little cottage where within five minutes of being in, Robert had a strong coffee by his side. He was seated on the floor. Having taken off his coat and shoes, he had proceeded to put his son on the play mat for a roll around. Due to the fact they spent so much time at the hospital, Seb was not getting the same amount of play time Robert was sure he had had at Home Farm so normally appreciated it all the more. Yet he wasn't so active that evening.

"What is up with this little one?" asked Victoria, confirming her brother's suspicion his son was a little quiet as she brought in dinner for the two of them and Diane, who was to be joining them.

"Don't know," Robert admitted, wishing that he did.

When he had been at the hospital that day he had wondered if he should take his son down to paediatrics but Seb was taking his food and there had so far been no temperature. He was a little restless early that morning but had settled right down.

Diane had told him before he could not panic every time his son's behaviour was different to what it was the day before.

After all, he was just a little baby who at the end of the day was going through an awful amount and should not be going through what he was at such a young age. He was apart from the woman who had carried him for nine months after just nine weeks.

And it was on that point that he had to settle right then until Seb shown some other signs if he was ill.

As they sat down for dinner, the baby seemed happy enough as he babbled a little to himself. However, as his father, aunt and grandmother ate that was a situation which once more change and he became restless. Robert could feel his sons want for a cuddle.

"Someone is getting tired," Robert said knowingly as he got up from the dinner table as Seb let out a scream, leaving his meal half eaten and picked up his son.

"Is it time for someone to go to bed?" asked Victoria as her nephew whimpered a little in his father's arms. She got up and went to Roberts side, where she ran her hand over her nephew's head.

"I think it is," her brother confirmed.

"Why don't you finish your dinner – I can bath him," Victoria offered.

"Thank you but I can do it," Robert holding him close to his chest. He got that Vic and Diane wanted to help but he had to keep a bit of routine for Seb and for him to know who he was with. Though he knew his aunt and his grandma, it was not enough. Robert was sure his lad needed his dad.

Besides bedtime was one of Robert's favourite times of day with his son. Since the accident, he had learnt that bath time was when Seb was most likely to laugh. So much of their day was about his mum yet this often felt as if this was the only time for them. That night, Seb was as good as ever at bath time but it was obvious that he was tired as his eyes were closing before he had got out the water. Robert's boy was ready for bed.

At the end of the day, Robert Sugden found himself on his bed, cradling his son as Seb took his bottle, his little hand resting on the back of his fathers. The next day Robert was sure would be the same as that one had been – but there was hope and as long as they were together, as father and son, maybe it would all turn out fine.

"Mummy is going to be fine," he promised. "It's all going to be fine."

His throat tightened for at that moment the face of Aaron Dingle had once more popped into his head. Much as he disliked the fact, his fine and Seb's fine were very different things and that did not appear to be changing anytime soon.

"Whatever happens, we'll stick together little man," Robert murmured to himself more than his son as he kissed his forehead. And that was what he would cling too through the days to come.

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	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

When Robert woke up, it was to the sound of crying which in and of itself not so out of the ordinary right then. Bex had given him the impression that their son was a good sleeper. Robert did not know if it was the disruption to his routine or the fact he was missing his mother… But he knew if there was one way he would not describe his beloved boy, it was as a good sleeper.

"It is ok mate, daddy is here," he said with his full-on morning voice, as he got out of his bed and crossed to the crib. If he was not much of a sleeper for his dad, then Sebastian had never been a crier. But that morning was different.

From the moment his dad got his little lordship out of bed, he screamed.

No matter what Robert tried to do for Seb that morning, it was not right. He cried when his dad gave him warm milk and then cool milk, he cried when he had wet himself and then he cried when Robert changed him. He cried when he set down on his changing mat to have roll around and he cried when he was held.

"The little prince is not in a good mood today is he," Diane sighed.

"No, he is not," Robert agreed.

His sister tried to help him, but his aunt could do no better than Sebastian's father.

"It is a bit earlier than normal, but we are going to go and see Bex now," announced Robert. It was only nine thirty but with the best will in the world Seb, Rob had a feeling was not going to last. He wanted to sit with the mother of his child for as long as he ever did those days, but he knew it was not going to happen.

"Do you think it is a good idea to take him in today?" asked Victoria.

"Yes, I do," Robert nodded. No matter what mood the baby was in he did not see how a visit to his mother was going to hurt.

It was clear his sister did not agree with him, but she seemed to understand she was not going to put him off. He was going to do this whether she thought it was the right thing or not.

True to form that day, Seb fussed thought out the drive to the hospital.

"Come on, little man, give me a break here," Robert asked him as they sat at a set of traffic lights. He tried to hold the little one's hand to comfort him but that did not seem to work either.

Seb whinged as he was got out of the car And then he cried when they got into Rebecca's room. Normally he was a good as gold when they were in with his mother but that wasn't the way that way.

"I promise I am doing a much better job than it sounds like," he tried to reassure Rebecca.

And yet Seb continued to fuss all the way through the visit Robert could not help but feel the pressure.

It occurred to him she thought he was going to be an awful dad. Either that or she was literally going to think he was so bad, it was going to rouse her from the coma so she could take over the care of her son once more. That was the best way this could end he thought to himself as he rubbed his sons back.

"Why don't you have a sleep mate?" Robert cooed.

Seb, at last, seemed quieter. But once more it did not last.

Much sooner than normal, Robert threw in the towel. He was at his wit's end and they were going home for a nap. "I am really sorry Rebecca, I think I am going to have to take him home," Robert admitted at last – he wished he did not have to say that for it did feel to him like a defeat – but that day there just was not another way.

If he was going to take care of their boy as he should be looked after right then, then he was going to have to take him home. Pushing the pram out the room, with the nappy bag slung over his shoulder, Robert Sugden missed the twitched in her hand which said Rebecca White was waking up.

X x x

Once the two of them were home Robert had to admit even if his son did not feel any better then he did.

He could care for him properly here.

That said, there was the worry that something was wrong with Seb for he did not think he had ever known his son to fuss like this. Going off of his gut, for he did not have much more to go on Robert decided to book a doctors appointment. Seeing as the next one he could get was in a couple of days he still felt more settle. Seb was fussy but he did not think he was in pain and he could always take him in sooner if that changed and he would for he was not going to have his lad suffer.

Feeling as if he had done the right he had just managed to sit down with a cup of coffee when his sister came rushing into the room.

"Where is the fire?"

"Have you heard the news?" Victoria asked.

Robert shook his head and wondered if he wanted to know.

"Lachlan has been arrested. You were right."

"How do they know?"

"Rebecca is awake."

Robert felt something uncomfortable in his chest for he had not known it, but he had never wanted to be wrong so much in his entire life.

Lachlan was Chrissie's son and no matter what had gone on between them in the time since then, there had been a time when he and Chrissie had loved one another and when they made each other very happy. That time might be done, but he had never wanted this end for her, killed by that which she had always loved most.

"I have to go and be with her," He said as he stood up.

He knew Seb was not feeling well but if there was one thing in the world which might make the lad feel better it might be seeing his mother.

"Shall we go and see mummy?" he asked Seb.

And for the first time in weeks, he was going to be able to see his mother. And she was going to be able to see and talk to him. Going without there son did not seem to be an option for Robert right then. Rebecca had suffered enough without him keeping her son from her. Victoria gave her brother a look which said she thought he should take her nephew into the hospital as much as she had done earlier that day but once more, Robert was not to be swayed.

x x x

Robert had felt full of hope on his way to the hospital. He knew that this was not the fix for all the problems which they had in the world, but he was sure this was the start of them all getting better. It was going to make his little lads life better for sure.

At long last, after the very fussy morning, he had had Seb fell asleep in the car on the way back to the hospital and Robert did not know if it was very bad or very good timing. Good for him as he was more than ready for his lad to have a rest, but he thought if he did not wake up when they went in to see his mother then it was going to be bad for Rebecca.

Robert very carefully got there son out of his pram and carried him into the room on their arrival.

if only the lad had been awake then he knew he would have cooed over him, explaining that mummy was awake and it was all going to be ok for them now…. but that was not the way she looked.

Suddenly, he was very glad Sebastian was asleep.

"Hi." he smiled at her.

"hi." her response was monotone and her eyes were cold. He did not have to ask if she had been told the fate of her family – it was written all over her face. He wished to god he had been there to break it to her.

"My family is all gone," said Bex as she rolled over on the bed.

Robert felt his heartbreak for her, for he did not think all the years he had known the Whites he had ever seen one of them so defeated.

This was not the way they were.

This was not who she was.

"They are not all gone. You still have our boy," he said as he looked at Seb in his arms. She was always going to have their boy.

If nothing else, Bex had always been a rather devoted if possessive mother.

He wondered if the Australia plan had begun with her…

But she had always been interested in Seb which she wasn't now. Even when he had been the one to suggest that they – didn't become parents – she had fought to keep her son.

But now it seemed to him as if she could not so much as look at him without her heart-breaking.

"I want my dad and I want my sister," she said to him in a way that seems to suggest if she told him, then he was going to be able to go and get them for her and bring her life back to what it was before the crash.

But the two of them knew deep down in their hearts that was never going to happen.

"I know you do."

And then there was a look of disbelief on her face as if to say – is that all you can say to me?

"I want him to rot in hell." She stated bluntly before she turned to him anew and looked at the father of her child, with said child in his arms. "Go away," Rebecca whispered, in a pathetic, almost begging manner. "Please just go away."

That was the last thing which he wanted to do. He did not want her on her own to deal with all of this.

But then there was something in her eye which said she did need a bit of time on her own if she was ever going to be able to come to terms with that.

He nodded.

"Ok – I will go away for now. But when you are ready, we are going to be right here for you."

She nodded but showed no further interest.

x x x

Though he had always known there was a somewhat dark streak in the lad he had thought was the best friend he had ever had, Gerry had not known how deeply that had run until the day when he heard that Lachlan White had been the one to cause the deaths of his mother and grandfather.

There had been signs of course – the way he had let them all think he was dead. It had never sat easily with Gerry but with his family and his house and his education, Gerry had felt he had had good cause to trust the lad.

Now he never would again.

He sat on the sofa at The Mill with Liv at his side, and her big brother standing in the kitchen.

All three of them had a lot on their minds.

Gerry wondered about what Lucky's life was going to be now and Liv wondered how anyone could ever be so sick. Lucky had had a mother and a grandfather who loved him and he had thrown that all away.

When she thought of her own parents and what she would not have swapped to have a mother like Chrissie…

And of course, there was no competition between her father and Lachlan's grandfather. Lawrence had got it wrong in his life but he had not been sick in the head the way Gordon was.

And then there was Aaron – standing in the kitchen, with Scrappy at his feet knowing he should be worrying about Alex really and what time he was going to get back. But he had heard Robert had gone to see Rebecca when she had just woken up… and he was the only one in his mind. There was a time when the thought of him running to her side would have tormented Aaron to the depths of his soul, but all he could think right then was how tough that must have been.

If things were different, he would have run to Robert and checked he was ok… if only things were different. Instead, he kept silent vigil with Liv and Gerry and hoped better times were coming. For them all.

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	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

There truly was nothing like a bit of skin on skin contact, thought Aaron as he came around from sleep. There was something about it which soothed his soul.

He had been having the most lovely dream and as he turned over in the bed, he had been sure he was going to see a head of blond hair beside him, so it was quite a shock when he opened his eyes and he saw a head of hair as dark as his own.

For a minute he wanted to jump up and ask what the hell was going on and what was happening.

But then he remembered.

More than anything he was beginning to look forward to the day when he woke up and remembered what had got on – to a time when it did not hit him afresh when he got up.

He steeled himself a little against the pain, threw back the covers and sighed.

When it came down to it, this was by no means the worse his life had ever been and he was sure he was able to deal with it. He just had to get on and do it.

He felt slightly uncomfortable about wanting to jump up, for when it came down to it, Alex was his choice. He had had every chance at Christmas to be with the man he loved.

But he had made the choice to be with the man who he _wanted_ to love.

He pulled on a top, tracksuit bottoms and left the room. Alex had been on nights that week with the evening before being his first night off in a while so he was going to want a lie it.

On the way past his sister's room, he gave a tap and then did the same on Gerry's. "Feet on the floor you two." He said as he headed down to the kitchen to find Scrappy curled up.

On seeing his master walk into the room he opened one eye, and upon seeing Aaron was so disinterested he went back to his sleep.

"Love you too," he murmured as he stuck the coffee pot on, yawned and rubbed his eye on the sleeve of yesterday's hoodie which he had found on the back of the chair and promptly put on.

Another day.

The next half hour was a whirl of activity in the kitchen with the toaster and kettle and coffee machine going on and off, on and off.

Liv wasn't really a morning person any more than her big brother but they managed to mumble their good morning greetings and Gerry came down, up and awake for once. It was not like him to be so awake so early.

"Shall I go open up with Scrappy?" he asked and Aaron nodded, throwing him the keys for the scrap yard.

"Don't turn anything on till I am there for," the last thing he needed was Gerry with any limbs falling off.

The lad nodded and was soon out the door.

One down, one to go. Gerry was surprisingly easy to get out the house.

"Can I have a lift to school?" Liv asked with a yawn.

"What did your last slave die of?" her big brother asked.

"Inactivity."

Aaron rolled his eyes but from the time she had asked, Liv knew that her brother was going to cave. It was not as if she asked often, so on the rare occasion that she did he was happy to oblige.

"I wonder how Rebecca is doing today," his sister said to him as the two of them drove along.

At one point there had been no chance that she would have so much have mentioned her name about him due to what had gone on – she had been blackballed in their family after what she and Robert had done.

But things moved on, Aaron thought to himself. And priorities change.

It was only then he realised how bad the crash was – so bad that even Liv seemed to have forgotten Rebecca's sins.

"Terrible," he said bluntly.

If he woke up to find her, his mum, Paddy (he ignored the fact he wanted to add Robert's name on to that list) dead and gone he did not know how he would ever recover from it.

Liv hummed.

It was not as if the two of them had not gone through their own fair share of terrible.

"Did Alex come back to ours last night?"

"Yeah."

"I thought I heard him come in."

Aaron gave a nod to confirm this was the case and Liv felt her stomach twist a little. The truth of it was she was sure she liked Alex a whole lot more than she had liked Robert - but she was not sure if her brother felt the same way. She could well remember the way her brother's eyes had lit up at the mere thought of his husband but that did not happen with his new boyfriend.

Even after weeks of the two of them being together… She was not sure that was a good sign - in fact she was sure it was not.

By the time she had got out of the car at the school gates she had got into quite a contemplative mood.

"You alright?" her brother checked before she slammed the door.

"Fine."

"Have a good day!" Liv rolled here eyes for the truth was she enjoyed school as much as he had done.

Aaron then turned around the car and headed back to the village. It occurred to him halfway through the drive back he did not have his phone on him, something which made him feel instantly naked. He was going to have to go back for it he had had one too many calls from the school to feel truly comfortable without it, and he did not know what, with everything going on, who else might need to get hold of him.

Still, it was a trip he could do without as he had planned to go straight to the scrap yard.

When he had left, he had turned the light in the kitchen off and it was definitely on now.

Damn - so it was not as if he could even run in and out.

"I wondered where you were," Alex said brightly was Aaron came through the door. He came to kiss his boyfriend good morning and Aaron responded to the peck, dutifully.

"Liv tired this morning, so I drove her in."

Alex smiled – he was such a good brother and that was one of the reasons he had come to love him the way he had.

"I was thinking we have all been working hard lately haven't we? Why don't we take a trip to London in February half term?" Alex suggested as he munched on his toast.

"What, me, you and the kids?" asked Aaron in that manner which Alex could not figure out. Was he pleased by the idea or disgusted?

"Why not – me, you, Liv and Gerry."

"Well, a lot is going on –"

"We have got three weeks to get prepared to go... But if you do not want too."

But not wanting to was not the point of him and Alex. The point of him and Alex was for Aaron to get on with his life at last and to love a good man.

For there to be no drama and a stable life for him and Liv.

And suddenly when he thought of it, it sounded to him as if it was a good idea. Alex was right. None of them had had much of a break for ages.

"Why not?" Aaron asked. His sister was going to be up for it, of that much he was sure of.

And it never hurt to get out of the village for a while. It might even do him a bit of good. It might help get what he so wanted to get out of his head, out.

x x x

Robert was not so sure when it had changed so a trip to the café had become such a treat but when his sister had suggested it that day he had all but jumped at the chance. Maybe it was when for all intents and purposes he had become a full-time single dad. And if that was not a thought which would turn a man to straight black coffee, he did not know what was.

Or was it just the thought of it combined with a lack of sleep and worry?

Which would come as no surprise. Even though she was awake it beginning to be clear to him- very clear - that Bex was not yet a well woman and she was not going to be for some time to come. They were waiting for various tests results to come back. In addition to the care of their son, he felt as if he could not keep it all in his head.

But if Bex was not in a good way it was all the more reason for him to stay fit and well.

His son needed him he thought as he peered into the pram. Seb was at last asleep after a morning of tantrums once more. Robert was going to be glad when they got to the doctors.

It was as the two of them sat there the door opened…

The image of Aaron Dingle flashed through his mind as it always did when he was out and about in the village - for there was the ever-constant hope that it was going to be him behind every closed door - but it was not he who walked in but his kid cousin Belle. Robert was sure she felt the way she looked - like hell.

She paused upon seeing him and Rob felt an odd kind of kinship to the two of them. They were the ones who had got pulled into the White's drama and now it felt as if they were the only survivors left to tell the tale. Until Bex was well.

She looked as if she wanted to run and hide but they had seen each other and they both knew it.

Proving herself to be a true pigheaded Dingle, she came up to him.

"How's the baby?"

It felt to her as if he was all that was left of their past, when it felt to her as if she was going to get the chance to be so happy. She had been taking in by Lucky White time and time and time again and she had never learnt her lesson. Well, she had done now.

"He is ok," Robert nodded, grateful for her question. He had a feeling it cost her to ask. "Have you heard from Lachlan?"

Belle shook her head in a manner which said she was not expecting to either.

"No," it was very much over between them and so it would stay.

Robert felt a pang of guilt and he did not know why.

It was not as if he was or ever had been Lachlan's dad, he thought as he looked at Belle but he had been his stepdad. Was there anything he has done differently? Oh yes. There was a lot he could have done differently. But there was no good in worrying about all that.

It was done.

After Belle had come over to them, their trip out did not seem to be so much fun, even with the presence of Victoria. He decided it was time to go home. The day had been trying enough between Belle and Bex and he wanted to put Seb done for the rest.

As he crossed the street pushing the pram to walk across to the cottage, he saw Aaron was down the road. His heart swelled.

His best mate raised his hand to him and gave him a sad smile. He did not know what he thought of all of this. And he was not sure he wanted to.

But Aaron started walking towards him and it was clear he was not on the defensive.

"How is she?" Aaron asked as he walked over to Robert. He did not have to specify who she was.

"She is pissed off at the world," Robert admitted – and who would not be? Robert would have loved to have a proper chat, but it was clear Seb was not in favour…

The baby grumbled from his pram.

"He is a happy chap today," Aaron nodded.

"What can I say? He is my son," Robert said he headed in – he did not have to explain any further.

it was only when he realised that he had not felt awkward with Aaron that day… Robert wondered if he should have done.

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	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

Ever since the crash the one wish Robert had in his heart was that there were more good Whites in the world. He would trade ten Lachlan's for one Chrissie.

He did not think he had ever wanted that more than when he got the call to say they had the results of Bex's back scans returned.

It was not looking good. While there was some hope, for there always had to be hope –

It turned out the damage which was caused in the crash was not just to her brain but also to her legs.

And whether she was going to get up and walk anytime soon – or ever again – was still very much in doubt with the doctors.

"Jesus Christ," said Victoria on hearing the news.

"Has she not been through enough lately?" she asked her brother though she knew she did not have to.

If anyone knew what Rebecca had been through of late, then it was the father of her child.

"Does she know yet?" his sister asked him.

"I do not think they are going to ring and tell me without telling her first, do you?" asked Robert.

"Then you are going to have to go and support her through this." Once more he felt as if his sister was telling him things which he already knew.

But there was no point in having a go at her.

He ran a hand down his face for he knew all of this was going to be a lot easier for him to face if he had had a decent nights sleep but Seb did not seem to be very interested in giving him one of those. But maybe after they had been to the doctors that day things were going to get a little easier.

"I think I need to get up to that hospital now, " said Robert.

Victoria nodded her head.

"Do you want me to get the little man ready to go with you?" his sister offered.

"Yeah – thanks Victoria." A minute to compose himself was not going to hurt. And he had a feeling he was going to need a lot of that to get through the day ahead of him, as he had done every day since the crash which had altered all their lives forever.

X x x

Robert had had his moments when he was not sure if he was comfortable going into her room and sitting with Rebecca since the crash, but he did not think he had ever been as nervous as he was right then.

He had a feeling that they were very similar in the fact that they to liked to have control over their own lives and now she had been told that she was never going to walk again. He did not know where she was going to begin to deal with that.

Yet he knew he did have to go in there, for no matter what their past, in a way he was all the family she had left. Lucky was not going to be getting out of the police station any time soon by the sounds of it, so when she turned around and said remember this about Chrissie or remember that about Lawrence, he was all she was going to have, which he did think was a sad state of affairs, he had to be honest.

As he and Seb entered the room, Rebecca seemed as if she was a bit perkier than she had been in a very long time – and he could only take that as a good sign, though it confused him more than anything else.

"There he is," she said with a grin as she saw her son.

"Yeah – here's mummy," he said as he got Seb out of the car seat.

There was no need to dive into the heavy stuff too soon.

"He has been a bit grouchy the last few days – we are off to the doctors after we have been here, just for a quick checkup. But I thought the two of you needed a bit of time together." He said to her gently.

If she was not ready to talk then that was fine. But she had to know she at least had the choice.

But Rebecca did not say much to that at all.

Instead, she just looked at her son as if he was the most amazing thing which she had ever seen which was a feeling he was able to sympathize with. And so instead of trying to get her to face something which she very clearly was not ready too, Robert began to tell Rebecca everything which their son had been up to of late. All the ways he had changed and the things which their baby was learning to do. In his head, he knew that there were a million kids who had learnt to do them before Seb had and when he had been through all of these milestones other children were going to be doing them and achieving what his boy had. But Seb was unique and to him, it seemed as if he was the only one who ever achieved what he had.

During the time he was babbling about there boy though, Robert noticed there was a change in his mother.

She looked different and he was slightly panicked to see she looked pale. He fell silent.

"Rebecca, what is it?" if he had to go and get a nurse, he was ready.

Once more there was a pause.

"Robert, I am so sorry… and I should have told you this a long time ago… but there is a chance he may not be yours…"

Robert felt as if he had lost his hearing. He had to have lost his hearing – or at the very least heard wrong - because this was the event which had turned his whole world upside down. This was the reason he had lost his marriage and the best thing he had ever had.

He had done it all…. Lost it all and done so with the promise that the one good thing which had come out of all this was the fact he got to be a dad.

A dad to his gorgeous lad who made his life worth living when he had thought it was never going to be the case again.

He had a son and he loved his son and Seb was the cornerstone on which he had rebuilt his life.

"What did you say?" he asked, for he knew what he had heard but there was something in him which was never going to allow himself to believe that.

There had to be some kind of sick joke.

And besides anything else, she had said it in such a casual manner, or so it had felt to him. You did not deliver such utterly life-changing news like that.

He was sure you didn't.

"No, he is my son."

"I slept with two men around the same time," Bex stated as fact and to Robert he did not think she had ever been so cold.

For the first time, the thought of all she had lost of late went out of his head as he thought on all he had lost.

This was why he and Aaron had split. This was why their marriage had broken down and now she was saying…

No – no, he was not going to listen to this rubbish. Of course, he was his boy's dad. Rebecca was ill – she was confused. He crossed to the bed and picked the baby out of his mother's arms. "I have got to get Seb to his appointment."

"Did you hear me?" asked Rebecca.

"Oh yes I heard you." but he was going to choose to hear a pack of lies for that was all they were.

"Then where are you going?" Rebecca asked.

She knew she was in no state to take care of Seb herself no matter how much she wanted too. She knew he had been a good father to him. She knew she was being detached and she wasn't even sure how long she was going to want to keep her baby with her either, not in this place. It would be very different if they could go home.

But at that moment she had been compelled to say what she had.

"I am going to take Sebastian to his doctor's appointment," he said to her as if she was an idiot for even asking.

 _Where else would he be going?_

He put Seb back in his car seat, blocking out whatever Rebecca was trying to say to him as he did so and left the room without so much as turning back. Normally he was the first one to say 'goodbye mummy,' from Sebastian. Not that day.

He walked briskly to the car and did not look back.

Once he had got his son strapped into the car Robert looked at the ground and vomited.

The last few days and weeks had been some of the toughest of his life and he was not going to let them end like this. He couldn't do it.

He could not have gone through all of that just to have it end like this.

He did not think he had ever been one to bury his head in the sand and he did not understand why some people did that instead of facing the problems in their lives. He knew he had created more than his fair share but this was not one of them.

And with that knowledge, he did one thing which he never would normally do and he ignored what Rebecca had said.

"Daddy's coming," he soothed gently as he heard Seb cooed from inside the car.

Then he got inside himself and drove calmly to the doctor's surgery. They had the rest of their day to get on with.

He did not treat Seb any differently to the way he had done before his mother had said what she had. His first evaluation of the situation was the one which he believed to be true. Rebecca was not herself and she was saying things that weren't true because she was hurt.

That was the only explanation he thought to himself as they sat in the waiting room. He held his son in his arms and kissed his forehead and carried Seb through to see the doctor when the time came.

"Are you the father?" the doctor asked as if he knew what Robert had just been told.

"Yes, I am Robert Sugden," Robert nodded. No one else during the last few weeks had sat up with Seb during the night when the little man had not been able to sleep for missing his mother.

No one else had given him his bath and his bottle and sung him to sleep.

No one else had shifted there entire life so that their spun around existed around his.

He was sure that made him Sebastian's father in every way which was important.

"Ahh, I have only ever met his mother before," the man said with a smile. "now let's see if we can get to the bottom of whats troubling your son."

Robert nodded, wishing it would be so easy to get to the bottom of his own concerns.

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	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

When Robert got back to the village, he had to admit to himself he felt a lot better than he had done when he and Seb were out in Hotton.

This was his space and he knew it. And there were going to be no nasty surprises around here, no sick rumours to throw him.

And now he knew what was wrong with his son – why he had been so fussy and irritable of late they were going to be able to tackle that too.

"It is all going to be ok little man, daddy promises," Rob murmured as he got him out the car and headed to his stepmother's place of work.

"It's colic with the added bonus of acid reflux," announced Robert as he and Seb went into the B and B to find Diane and Victoria there.

When he saw the two of them, he knew he was faced with a choice.

To tell them what Rebecca had said to him or not - and he did not have to ask himself what he was going to do, for he knew as soon as he saw their faces, he came to an understanding with himself not to tell them what she had said.

For one thing, he had no proof yet. Rebecca had been through so much of late, she might not even know what she was saying. And for another thing, he knew damn well that the thought of Seb not being his was going to break their hearts.

It had broken his heart and he was not going to spread that around unless he absolutely had too.

"Oh our poor little fella," said Diana. "That does not sound as if it is much fun. Why don't you come and have a cuddle with your granny?"

She had had the great honour of knowing Jack's kids since they were kids themselves and she was well able to see that that morning had had quite the effect on Robert. The lad needed five minutes to himself.

Ever since Seb had been born, she had been as proud as punch as Robert. True enough there were things he had done in his life which she had to admit she was not so proud of him for but the way he obdoted on the little lad was not one of them. That made her hold her head higher.

After Seb had had his first course of medicine his stepmother and sister tried to encourage R to go for a lie-down. He had been running around so much of late that he did deserve a rest. But he knew before they said the words he was not going to go – he would just lie there thinking.

There was a time when he would have gone to the scrap yard and get his head down in to his work there for a bit as well, but if he did that then he knew he was going to come face to face with Aaron and if he did that, then there was a good chance he was going to tell him all that had gone on and that was not fair.

So as he just sat down on the sofa and listened Diane try to keep the baby calm, though he knew she was not really going to be able to do that. His boy was going to need his dad before long. And after a screaming fit through dinner, Robert had a feeling that time was coming much sooner than later.

"Why don't you take the little man out for a walk and see if that is going to settle him a bit?" Victoria suggested. God knows they had tried everything else.

Robert wished he had some grounding to bite back and tell her that was a bad idea but right then he could see it might work and the fact of it was he was willing to try anything.

He missed the days when he was just able to sit in the evenings and relax. But then there was no chance of him doing that tonight. His head was just going round and round and he could hear what Rebecca had said to him in his ear, whispering like a curse.

Not Seb's dad.

"Yeah I think I will," he said as he took Seb's coat off of the chair and put it on the litte one. It was not long since he had had his medicine and half a feed though god only knew Robert was aware that did not mean they were definitely in for a peaceful walk.

"You are going to get through this," his sister said to him.

Victoria knew Robert better than nearly anyone else in the world – but that night he knew she was misjudging him, no doubt putting his mood down to his concern for Sebastian. And he was worried about the colic and saddened that a little man so young was going through that.

But colic was not the thing that was threatening to tear their life apart.

"Thanks, sis."

Initially, after the two of them had left the cottage Robert was surprised to find he was happy his sister had suggested this to him for it was lovely to get out and get a bit of fresh air not only into Seb but also himself.

It was a time to be alone and to be quiet, the latter being a memo his son missed.

His joy soon worn off as his own troubles stalked him and Seb continued to be unsettled.

"Come on mate, I'm trying here – meet daddy half way," he pleaded.

But for the first time, his own use of the 'd' word bothered him.

What if he wasn't? What if Rebecca was telling the truth? He felt as if he could not contemplate it, but he knew he had too.

He walked on through the village.

Robert realised that somewhere between home and where he was right then he had begun to cry as well.

This was not what he had wanted. His life was not meant to be like this.

He cried for all of them. For Andy and Katie, for his mum and dad, for Chrissie, for Lawrence, for Seb, for Liv…

And Aaron. Good God, most of all he cried for Aaron.

They had got married. They were so close.

They had nearly had it all.

They had gone all the way from being co-conspirators in the robbery at Home Farm to husbands and at one point or another they had been everything in between. He had been through more with Aaron than anyone else in his entire life and just then he thought he would go through any period of their love just to feel it all over again.

The joy and the pain, the misery and then anger, the happiness and the soul-soothing peace only being together could bring.

And then he had thought with his cock instead of his head on one night when he had been lonely. And it was all over.

When Aaron had needed him to be strong for him the very most he had failed as he was sure he was failing his baby right then.

And it was not just him he had to be strong for.

No matter what was going on between the two of them, he knew he had to be there for Rebecca the best way he knew how – she had lost everything.

Yet she also seemed dead set on taking everyone from him.

He wasn't sure if he could stand it right then – if he could be there for the sister of his ex-wife as he had a feeling Chrissie would want him to be deep down.

God, he thought to himself, when it really came down to it – it was all such a mess. And that was all he knew.

X x x

Aaron had just been putting out the bins at The Mill when he had come out to see Robert walking in the rain.

After Christmas, he was sure he had done the right thing and it had ensured that his future with Alex was going to be secure… but at the same time the thing which he hated most in the world to see those he cared for or those he had cared for in the past in pain.

And Robert was definitely in pain…

Even if he wanted to walk back in and not say something to him he knew he could not for it was not in his nature.

Robert was yet to clock him so he had a moment to observe father and son for just a moment. Aaron was in no doubt that the baby was wrapped up warm as was befitting for it was a cold February night. On the other hand, Aaron was concerned to see, however, that his ex-husband did not even have so much as a scarf on and only a thin jacket – the idiot.

He approached him and then stopped once more. It was raining – but those were definitely tears in Roberts' face. He knew him well enough to know when he was upset and when he was just wet – and he was the former.

"Robert!"

On hearing Aarons voice, Robert wished he could turn and run. If he was asked he did not think anyone was going to believe him but he truly had not planned on turning up there that day. He hadn't meant to head to The Mill – he just had.

As if he was some sort of homing pigeon.

"If the two of you do not come in then you might catch your deaths," the man he had once been lucky enough to call husband said.

They looked at each other for just a moment.

Robert debated rejecting the offer which felt as if it was the right thing, or going into the home he had planned for them both…. The temptation was too strong.

x x x

First thing was first – Aaron got Robert to take off his wet jacket and put on instead one of his own warm hoodies.

"You can't get sick Robert – " Aaron stated as fact. Nothing could be closer to the truth.

The new dad nodded as he pulled the garment on and tried not to inhale the scent of the scrap yard and shower gel which clung to it. God how he loved that smell.

Then Robert got Seb out the pram and tried him on a bottle. As if the young man had had enough of crying – either that or the medicine which he had been given was finally beginning to kick in – he took this second bottle with greater ease than the first and settled in his dad's arms. For once that day, Robert felt as if he was doing something right.

Once his son had had his own drink, Aaron presented Robert with a coffee and the new dad knew it was going to be the most wonderful thing he had ever tasted. Aaron had always known how to make a good cup of coffee – it was one of those little things Robert missed about him, along with a hundred others.

"So are you going to tell me why you were walking about the village crying or am I going to have to drag it out of you?" Aaron asked.

Robert wasn't sure if he knew where to start.

With honesty he supposed.

"It is all such a mess."

"What is?"

"Everything."

"I am going to need you to be a bit more specific."

Robert looked at Aaron as if trying to weigh up what to do – and then he blurted what had happened that day out. He had not intended to, but it was so easy to talk to Aaron and god knows he had to tell someone – or else he was going to burst.

Aaron looked at him blankly for a moment, no doubt thinking about the ramifications of this…

The current ones and those they had been feeling for the past few months already.

"I do not understand – if you are not the dad then why did she say that you were, why put your name on the birth certificate."

There were more and more questions going around Aaron's mind and the more he thought about them the angrier he found he was.

There was a taunting little voice saying she had done it all to destroy them.

Maybe she had been able to see what they had and thought 'no - no they cannot be that happy if I am not' but that had been the first time Aaron had been truly happy in so long - since him and Jackson in their very earliest days… before that had just all gone to hell as well.

"I do not know – to mess with me?" Robert asked and it was clear there trains of thought were on the same tracks.

But to Aaron it did not seem likely – were they doing a disservice to Rebecca, he wasn't sure. He did not suppose it really mattered.

"She has been through a lot lately. She might just be confused."

"That's what I keep telling myself," Robert admitted.

Aaron reached out and took Roberts hand. He looked like his best friend who had had the weight of the entire world on his shoulders when he arrived. He looked as if he was a bit more peaceful now.

Aaron rubbed his thumb backwards and forwards along the back of Roberts hand.

"I just do not know what I am going to do –"

 _If he is not mine._

Aaron could well hear what Robert would not dare to say in front of him.

But that was not what was important right then…

Aaron looked at his ex. And all he saw was an overstressed dad who had too much on his plate and not enough sleep to deal with it.

"Shut your eyes," Aaron murmured

"I need to –"

He threw him a pillow from the other end of the sofa.

"Shut your eyes."

Robert looked at him blankly for a moment as if he was trying to work out if he was going to be able to get forty winks here and then he nodded. Yes – he would sleep here better than any where else. The pillow, which was soon under his head, smelt deliciously of home and for a moment he found he was able to focus on that…

And if that was not a thought that was sleep inducing then he did not know what was. As Robert drifted off Aaron tried his best not to do that creepy thing when you watched someone else sleep but god damn it he was doing it before he so much as knew it. Try as he might to deny it, Robert was still so beautiful to him and if he tried to think of him any other way then all he was, was a liar to himself.

He felt the same punch in the gut as he had done every other time he knew the two of them could not be together. For a moment the mad thought of why could they not be together hit him but too much water had run under that bridge.

He knew that.

As if trying to distract him, there was a small cry from the pram.

During the time which the two of them had been talking Seb had managed to go to sleep but that was clearly not a state which the little one wanted to stay in, thought Aaron, though his daddy was quite enjoying it.

"Shhh," he murmured as he crossed to Seb and picked him up, gathering him close.

"None of that, lad," he murmured and kissed his forehead on instinct.

It was strange given what he just heard but for the very first time he really looked at the little fella and Aaron admitted to himself alone that all he saw when he looked at him was a mini Rob.

In fact if Seb was not Roberts, then Aaron would eat his hat – he was sure of it.

In order to settle the lad, he walked and bounced with him a bit. Aaron did not have a huge knowledge of babies, but he had babysat for Leo more than once and he had vague memories of a tiny baby girl call Liv who he had adored, even then.

And they did say practise made perfect. It was gratifying for Aaron to see Sebastian obviously agreed for instead of having a full on melt down, soon the baby was snuggled deep in his arms, asleep.

Just as his son was snoozing on Aaron's chest right then, Robert was slumbering on.

Aaron did not see any need to change that. He stood, walking and pacing with the little one, until he was sure he was deeply asleep enough to go back in him pram. After tucking Seb in, Aaron went back to the sofa and Roberts side, and watched the log burner flicker in the dark of the night.

They stayed there for well over an hour and it was only Robert waking up which disturbed the peace.

When he woke up he felt disorientated to find himself – well, at home. He did not know why he was there but then he remembered all that had gone on.

What Rebecca had said to him. Then what he had said to Aaron.

"Alright sleepy head?" asked the man beside him.

"Time is it?" he asked.

"Time you were turning into a pumpkin."

Yes – he supposed it was he thought as he saw the pram out the corner of his eye.

"I need to get him home," said Robert - he felt embarrassed to have fallen asleep here, even if Aaron had all but ordered him to do so, yet it had felt so comfortable. And glorious to unburden his mind – yet he wished he had not put that burden on to Aaron. That wasn't fair.

"Sorry," he said meaningfully without looking at him.

There was a lot of his life he was not happy with. But Robert did not want to pass that on. He got up and begun to get himself and Seb ready for the off.

"You do not have to say sorry - you are my best mate," and if he did not help, then Aaron was sure he was not worthy of the title. Robert wished he was not afraid to label the look on Aarons' face right then as he dared to turn to him- once upon a time, he would have named it love.

Shaking such thoughts out of his head he got up and looked at his son, tucked up in his pram.

He was sure he had not been the one to tuck his giraffe up next to him.

He looked at Aaron with what he knew was shock on his face.

"Getting to know the little man?" asked Robert daringly. He still did not know how far the two of them could dare to joke about all of this.

He looked at Sebastian himself for a moment and felt his heart break a little. How could he think of him otherwise, but as his son? As his little man?

Almost as if he was able to read his thoughts, Aaron was at his side. "Do not let anything change until you know the facts," he advised.

Facts were important things – lives could be made or broken on them. The same could be said of lies.

"I won't. Thank you, Aaron."

"Anytime."

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	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

"I want a DNA test."

Robert wanted to be the last person to put Bex under any type of stress at the moment but as it was, he knew this was something which he had to do. For him and for Sebastian. He believed he was his son but even if he was not then Robert owed the baby this much at least.

And Aaron was right for he could not change anything until he got some facts. And facts were what Robert wanted.

Bex had had a rough time – but she was not the only person who mattered right then.

"But I told you that he is not yours," said Bex as if that should be the end of the matter.

He had come to the hospital for the two of them to sort this out. There was no point in letting it drag out.

Robert took a breath in and out. She did not look as if she was the most on the ball she had ever been.

"Well, the thing is Rebecca we both know there is a chance he is mine - and after the last few months I am not going to give up on Seb without knowing for sure one way or the other." He could not do that. He had walked away in the past from things and people which mattered to him and he had regretted it. He was not going to be giving his child up without a fight.

And even if he was not his then he loved him enough to fight for him.

She looked at him blankly before nodding, acquiescing to his request.

Her small protest she had to admit gave him hope that maybe this was her trying to play god with their lives. If she was so sure her son was not his then why did she mind him getting the test.

"Fine, yes, we will do a DNA."

"Rebecca, if what you said yesterday - if you think you got it wrong one."

He wanted to give her every chance which he could to take it back to make it not true. He was not even going to be angry with her.

But she shook her head – she did not look as if she remembered what she had said to him the day before but she was not going to say she had got it wrong.

"Ok – well then we will do the test and go from there," he said with more confidence than he felt.

He just had to hope it went his way.

x x x

"Alex and I were having a chat about half term – I wondered what you thought about a trip to London?" Aaron asked as he and Liv sat down to dinner, the day after Robert had come and told him what Rebecca had said to him. Had had to admit he wasn't too sure if being in the village right then was a good idea. When he and Robert had broken up it had not been easy on either of them to get over the other and as long as the two of them were confiding in each other, it was not going to get any easier. In fact ever since they had had that chat, Aaron had had to stop himself picking up his phone to ask Robert what was going on. There was a voice in him which said the two of them were best mates. So him wanting to ring him up and know what was going on in his life was nothing more than the natural curiously which one friend was going to have for the life of the other.

But there was a second voice in his head which told him to pull the other one – it might have bells on, after all.

Another incentive to go was how excited Liv was at the prospect of them going to London. It was the first time they would have made a thing of half term and he knew if they did not do it soon then they were going to miss the boat all together.

"Can Gerry come?" she asked.

The two of them were best mates after all and it was an easy yes for Aaron to give. He would rather have them with them wreaking havoc than home alone.

"Yeah Gerry can come too," said Aaron with a shrug.

"Then I am well up for that." Liv beamed. Aaron nodded. That was the answer which he had been looking for.

And it was going to be the first time which he had taken Liv away which he was sure was going to be a laugh. The last time she had left the village she had had to go and see her ill mum - no, she deserved a break and so did he.

"So, when did you come up with this idea?" she asked with a smile.

"I didn't - it was Alex," he admitted truthfully.

"That makes sense - he is a great guy. You like him?" she asked.

"I am with the guy, of course I like him. And are you saying your big brother is not a great guy just because I did not think of going to London?"

She gave him a playful scowl which was what she thought of that.

Liv could not say that she completely felt at ease with that answer. Not after the other morning and not after the way she had seen her brother with Robert. She had seen what Aaron in love looked like and it was not the way he looked when he was with Alex.

But it was early days - and no one could deny that Alex really did care for her brother and even more so seemed to care for her and Gerry too. She imagined the lot of them could rub along alright together.

When they got to know each other. The unwelcome thought of how easy it had felt for her to get to know Robert came into her head.

It was not so very often that she admitted to herself that it was not just her brother who missed Robert Sugden yet right then she had to admit to herself she was having one of those rather unpleasant moments when she did have to admit it to herself. And she hated it as it made her miss him even more.

The thing was when the two of them had found her she had felt as if she had got two big brothers for the price of one as it were – and that was not something which was easily replaced.

"Are you ok?" Aaron asked.

He had expected Liv to be dead excited when she had found out they were taking off for a little bit. He had not thought he was going to be giving her food for thought.

"Yeah!" Liv said as she shook herself out of her thoughts and back in to the room. She would focus on dinner and plans for London, she thought to herself. They were not topics which hurt her head of her heart.

x x x

Even though he had tried with all of his might, not for the look for the signs which may tell him everything or nothing when Seb was asleep that day, Robert peared into the cot and asked himself for the first time if the two of them looked similar.

It had never mattered before if he looked like a White or a Sugden for Robert was under the impression that he was a perfect mix of the two of them but now he had had that comfort ripped away.

And so he did all he could to see if he could see the ways which he and his son were similar and of course, he thought to himself – nothing was clear to him. That was what he hated the most.

What he needed was a second opinion Robert knew as his sister walked into the room.

For just a moment he tried to think of a way to ask this question without Victoria smelling a rat but then there was a voice in him which said he was over complicating this.

All he had to do was ask the question – so he did.

"Do you think he looks like me?" Robert asked.

He hadn't dared to think like this before but now that he was doing so it was very hard to do otherwise.

"No - not at all," Victoria said to him straight faced and he felt as if he had been kicked in the gut. if the two of them did not look alike to other people then there was a much her chance that what Rebecca had said was true and if that was the case -

"My nephew is so much cuter than his daddy!" Victoria followed up with and it took a moment for Roberts's brain to convert what his sister had said into what it was - a joke.

"Very funny."

"Why?" she asked as she looked into the crib and then at her brother and realised something was wrong.

"Nothing," her brother said to her but she knew him better than that. So well in fact that she understood even if she did try to push this he was not going to fess up to what he was thinking.

Victoria turned back to the baby and stroked his cheek and hoped for all pf their sakes that whatever was in her brother's head was not going to come to anything – for all of there sakes.

X x x

It took a couple of weeks to arrange but the hospital said they were going to do the DNA test for Rebecca and Robert. Whilst Robert would have been more than happy to arrange to have a private one done, in the end, it was agreed with Hotton University Hospital that they did it for the good of Rebecca's mental health.

The day before they were due to go in Robert made sure that he and Seb got to spend a lot of time together – on their own. They took a long brisk walk around the village a, both wrapped up and ended up at the swings where the young father contemplated the fact that his life could spin off into a very different direction the next day. He did not think he wanted that at all.

It was hard for him now to believe there was a time in his life when he had thought having Seb was the worst thing that could ever happen to him. Of course, at that time he had not been Seb. He had just been this baby who was coming to destroy so much of the life he had worked so hard to get too. He had seen the way his life was going to change and the ends that were going to be brought on by him having a child.

He had not seen the opportunities.

"Is he not a bit young for that?" he heard someone asked and turned to fine Aaron there.

He had tried to stay away from Seb and Rob when he had seen them – but it turned out that was into something which he was very good at.

"Probably, but he is my son isn't he? He's very advanced for his age," Robert beamed.

"Is he?" Aaron asked. He had heard nothing since that night.

He left it to Robert to decide whether he was asking if Seb was very advanced for his age or, well – the other thing.

"Well – I don't know yet but by this time tomorrow I will. I am going up to the hospital early on in the days – then we will see where we are, wont we?" he asked the lad in his arms. The truth was he felt nothing short of desperate at the thought of what he was going to do in he morning – but confessing that was not going to help. It was not going to change the fact he had to do it.

"No matter what they say tomorrow, I think he has been very lucky to have you."

And if anyone else in the world had said that to him then Robert knew for a fact it would have meant so much less.

"Thanks."

Together the three of them stayed there for a while, with Robert thinking about the next day and Aaron about London.

He had been right what he had thought when he was with Liv. It was time for them to get out of the village for a bit.

Maybe that way when the four of them went off to London he was going to be able to get there, have a great time and leave any feelings he had ever had for Robert Sugden there when he came back. But for right then he sat quietly with his friend and his son, hoping Robert was going to get the result which he wanted.

 _Please review!_


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